Mothers In The Workplace Essay, Research Paper
Mothers in the WorkplaceAs Barbra drops Jessica off at the regular day-care, staffed with well-trained, caring professionals, she stops to think for a moment. Is this the right thing for our daughter? Should my husband or me stay home with Jessica, even though we can’t afford to? Will day-care cause problems for Jessica that we can not foresee? These are just a few questions that a mother might ask herself as she gets herself off to work. Most working mothers feel like their dedication should be to their children instead of a steady job. Now that we live in a more modern lifetime, mothers can work and feel good about themselves.When it comes to becoming a parent, many issues are presented. The major issue for mothers is the fact of whether to work or not. Mothers are strong individuals with big hearts. No matter what the choice is, her family will still respect her for her choice. Working and raising a child is the best choice for a mother. Mothers who work, have less problems. For one this means there are two incomes in the family and it also helps with the pride of the mother. Another issue faced is the way a mother may feel about a child going to a child care, in the long run she knows it is the best. Mothers can find guidance if they are not able to find the steps of how to deal with continuing to work. Mothers also know how important it is, even if they work, to show love and want to be around their child(ren).When a couple are trying to raise a family, it is much easier when there are two incomes. This way the parents do not have to worry about the financial surprises that come up. For example, if the husband or wife loses his or her job, and does not have a second income to depend on, the family would be in financial burden. Also double income families do not have to worry about the stress put on the father or mother because with an extra income helping out there are less concerns.Having a double income family mothers deal with less problems. One reason mothers who work have less problems is because they are not under so much emotional stress. They are not inside of a house all day doing repetitive house work. Instead they are working and enjoying the drive or walk to and from work. Also appreciating the environment of people around them. In a study of “745 married women” it is supported that the mothers who are employed are in a better emotional stage than mothers who work at home. Barnett states, in a 1989 report, “women involved in both work and family roles reported better physical health and fewer emotional problems that non-employed women (28). Mothers who work can go to work an d relax if things are tough at home. And if things get tough at work, mothers can also come home and get the comfort she needs from her family.Besides the less emotional stress that double income relieves a working mother of, it also seems to be the more popular choice today. Barnett states, “today the so-called ‘traditional’ family with the breadwinner father and stay-at-home mother, accounts for less than 3 percent of American families. The number of two-income couples sky-rocketed in the last decade from 20.5 million to about 31 million” (3). It seems like the more common situation to be in is a more stable family of two incomes. Back a couple years ago, in 1994 and 1995, sixty percent (60%) of married couples had double incomes. Compared from 1980 to 1990, the “percent of families” that “had full-time-employed husbands and wives” raised up eight percent. And is still looking to raise even further (Barnett 4).Mothers not only work for the extra income in the family but also for pride. Working mothers work because it makes them feel good inside. The opposing side says that they like staying home and taking care of the house and the children, but working mothers argue that it feels important to work. It gives them the sense of a second family. At work, people count on these employees for specific jobs. This is another way to tell mothers that they are important. Barnett says “a recent large survey conducted by the Women’s Bureau of the Department of Labor reported that 79 percent of the quarter of million women who responded said they either ‘liked’ or ‘loved’ their jobs” (26). These statistics prove that working mothers are very satisfied with working and attaining to a family as well.Other than just working, mothers also know how to show importance in their families. A family can make it on a single income or even a single parent, but without love or togetherness, how would a family be complete? It wouldn’t! This might just be part of a mother’s heart, but whatever it may be, a mother definitely knows how to get these two specifics taken care of.The first importance in a family is love. A working mother knows that in order to have a well growing and healthy family, there has to be love. The way love is expressed to a child when the child is younger can make a child grow up to be a better adult (Kazma 29). If a child grows up around love, the chances are he or she will carry on this affection to his or her own family someday. When a mother thinks of love, it should not be too difficult to disengage. It comes straight from her heart; it is a natural act. Love can be showed in little ways just as well as big ones. For example, just dropping a little note into the lunch box before the child goes off to school shows the mother is thinking of her child and loves him or her (Kazma 36). Love does not have to be presented one on one. Unexpected gifts can mean more than just the words “I love you.”
Other than just love, a family also needs togetherness. When a mother and father both work, children can get the wrong idea that there is no time for them. But if there is shared time in the family, these complications can be dismissed. When there is time that is being “wasted,” spending time together can take its place of this (Kazma 15). Children do not need a lot of time, just enough to show someone cares. This could mean sitting down and coloring a picture or having a heart to heart talk about what had happened that day. No matter how much time is spent together, the effort has to be there.Mothers might stop to think that because they are dropping their children off to a day care, they are not a good parent but that is not the truth. Working mothers have a greed in their mind that maybe their children will experience new adventures with the day care workers and forget who gave birth to them. These are all just false allegations. In an article from the magazine “Parents,” Iarovici writes about her experience and troubles she had to face with working and parenting. After having a child she went back to work and got asked many questions about her daughter’s well being. At first, Iarovici thought to herself, yes what if the well being of my child is ruined by the day care? And what if she does not know that I am her mommy when I pick her up? As she thought more about it, she realized no matter how much she is away from her daughter, she will know who her real mother is. As Iarovici states in her article, “sitters come and go in families just as children come and go for sitters. But a mother is there forever” (177 and 179). Other advise on this idea is to let your child know who you are. Show a close relationship with him or her as soon as he or she is born. This way there is a less chance that the child will feel neglected (Curtis 55).As couples get ready to have a child or start a family, issues start to enter the minds of the “to be” father and/or mother. There are ways to get help through these type of matters. For example, Jane Schindewolf, 1997’s “Mother of the Year,” went through a similar situation. Schindewolf is an average married mother with one child. When her child was born and the fact of going back to work was fast approaching, Schindewolf felt captivated. She did not know exactly how to handle one specific issue: working and being a parent. Because she worked as a “marketing manager,” Schindewolf knew she would soon have to return to work and leave her child in a day care. This scared Schindewolf and made her realize she needed some guidance. That is when she went to the hospital that she delivered her child in. In the hospital, there was a special organization of mothers that dealt with these specific type of problems. Realizing that this program was the best thing that could have happened to her, Schindewolf decided she would not stop there. She became on of the volunteers and helped others in need the same kind of guidance (Buick 1-5). This is not an original story. Feeling bad about working can happen to any parent, father or mother. The best way to deal with this type of situation is to face it straight forward. If the problem is acted on right away, it is easier to find the answer and solve.Growing up in a divorced family, I had to deal with the troubles of only one income. My mother, not a college graduate, had to raise my sister and me. This was especially difficult because there was only one income we could depend on. Even though there was not a definite choice between having one or two incomes, I know it is still difficult to only have one. I would have never wanted it any other way. I liked my mother working. It gave me the time I needed when I got home from school to myself. It also gave my mother a chance to get away and let off any stress she needed to. Working and being a mother is the best choice my mother could have ever made, and I plan to make the same choice when that time comes.